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Prince Shining Drifter
044add
>find a demon with a big head and horns and just uh, arrange a donation
>If you get the reeds from the edge of the river lethe and gilter out all the forgetfulness magic, there might be some residual mana
“Now, I could craft such a thing myself, but it would take me too much time. Certain raw materials could speed it up a great deal, though – if I can do it without making enemies too close to home?”
”It is possible. The reeds of the river of passing can carry suitable sympathies, if you find and select the best, but many rich and jealous kingdoms cling to its shores, and where they are wild, there are other things to be wary of. Not anything you couldn’t deal with, but it would be a troublesome trip, of inconveniences and dull dangers.”
”Don’t know if it’d be quick, either.”
”The claiming of a horn is more promising. Nearly all such that you could claim from demons would be either unsuitable, or inflame rivalries and grudges with your domain, but there is one that occurs to me.”
”A realmroot of the wyrwyld tastes thanautos and is sunk to hell, where lust and gluttony and conquest meet the ruthless appetites of nature. In eternal rut and ravaging the thousand-thousand spawn of Kuph-and-Ehrh breed and war and breed and war again among the flowers in the shadows beneath wood and earth. All who step into their domain and accept the game may challenge any, and victors take whatever prize they choose from the bodies of the losers. Win it by whatever means, and you may take the very horn of Kuph, or Ehrh, or – whichever. You could easily shave it into what you need.”
”If you fail, you will pay your price in spawn to swell the bacchanal.”
“Ah, them. They have so little reason to do business with us, it’s been a while – though in some ways they’re a mirror to us. Well, that price is hardly one I haven’t paid before, but I am concerned with the time it could cost me...”
”Even time is overswollen, in the Spiral Tap.”
”Trapped in itself, there is no passing of its ages beyond that one of stone and wood and hide and flesh. It is potential which consumes and births itself. The years which it possesses in abundance can go nowhere else. Those lost to the dance will suffer a thousand nights of nature’s use, yet freedom finds them at the rise of but a single morning.”
“Well, that’s alright, then. That just leaves the potential embarrassment of having lost a game with another domain. Happens all the time, of course, but still... do you have other options? Perhaps in another plane?”
“For you I have it down to three more, Princess, all in mortal realms.”
”In a land of forges learned not yet of iron, a wizard young yet old has claimed a kingdom, though it knows it not. He studies magic of all kinds, yet the sorceries of seed and field and flesh and life are claws, sunk into his soul and gripped around his balls. Akamak, the Tyrian, the Everborn. Last Staffwife of the Altar of Huum. Key to the Cell of the Old Bitch.”
”Motherfucker. Colossal dick.”
”Poor boy, used so carelessly.”
”Escaped the curse, became one instead.”
”He sows oases in the desert. By bellies fed and throats quenched he has ten thousand lives saved and unshackled in his favor, a number which shall only ever increase. Beneath the city he has built a dungeon that can feed the appetites of his body and his mind, the latter far the worse. Through traps and tricks and monsters, its prisoners explore a hundred deviant dreams and a hundred more perverted nightmares.”
”(Honestly most of them aren’t that creative...)”
”The ecosystem it contains is aided by a thing that fits to what you seek, Princess. A bag that still spills all the fruits of the jungle that once was, covered by the sands he strives to sweep away again. If it is taken from him, he will have to use other, more prosaic methods to keep his laboratories fed, and that might force him to restrain its depredations just a little more.”
“Her husband, is he? How prestigiously awful. Hm... Wizards are troublesome to come too much to the attention of. I wouldn’t like to end up inside an unwelcoming circle of binding. But... it sounds like his specialities are in the mortal world. And perhaps Haviel would like having someone like that inconvenienced in his bad behaviour. No-one’s likely to object to me using a lot of magic to deal with magic, anyway. What else?”
“From a smoking island, steel in hand, the descendants of the low god Vol’hadal’pel stretch an empire under and across the sea. Seaslakes, they are called - scoundrels, buccaneers, romantic traders. He is a deity of the fecundity of the sea and shores and the fire beneath the earth, the hot jet in the dark deep that is the genesis of life. Now he sleeps, but his children carry his blood. They adventure to the furthest corners of the ocean and beyond to find more lands and lovers for their lusty hearts.”
“Their empire is better than some. They harbour true interest in other peoples and their nations and a love to learn their ways and hearts. They wonder and wander to sail and fight and plunder, but they do not by navies conquer, nor by armies subjugate.”
”It is still an empire. They build ports for their ships, storage for those ports, homes and farms and roads. They cannot help but displace, slowly. To love the other is in their nature for they cannot breed easily with each other. They need other peoples. When their children would begin to age and die, time turns them into a seaslake too. They can’t help but turn the tides of kinds and culture, wherever they go.”
”Before he tucked himself into his bed to rest, Vol’hadal gave to them a hook which, cast into any water, could pull up food enough to keep a ship’s crew hale and hearty. Those who win its use take on the furthest exploration expeditions. Without it, the pace of their expansion will slow. They will have to measure themselves more, tie themselves tighter to the lines of trade and traffic. Their roguish, jolly empire will have need to slow its growth, a little.”
“Pirates, hm? How fun. They seem like they could manage without it. Maybe visit the Valley a little more often... no, I shouldn’t think of that. It’s a new age. Still, an option for certain.”
”Finally, there is something that would suit you sourced from sciences. Technology is unreliable, with all the weaknesses of material existence, but there’s nothing stopping you from tying in a little magic to help it out, once you have it.”
”There is a world where sorcery is subtle, which seeks the void to find its way to other worlds, where machines begin to wake from dreams to knowing. In cities soaring over slums, a corporation has discovered a tool to end starvation. This device can consume any organic matter and produce nutrition that can keep a population healthy. The wealthy there already accept such machines in secret vaults within their walled and gated neighbourhoods, prepared to preserve them against the uprisings of their lessers. Recently a prototype was developed – portable for a single person, low on maintenance, not even terribly expensive to produce.”
”Not profitable.”
”Anti-profitable. The rich are snobs enough to never use it unless they have no choice. The poor would use it all the time. The farmers and the markets and the transportation services would collapse – they tell themselves, and almost believe it’s true. You could take it.”
“Tempting. What would Haviel think... there is a possibility it could one day be released, if left. Then again, it might be trashed, and the research cast aside. Perhaps they’d like me to try release the data...? Oh, or they might want to do it themselves. I could take the thing and the information on it and make them both the gift. Agh, a low-magic world, though, that’s awfully shallow to pour myself into...”
”(That means she’d have to act under more limits. Couldn’t use as much obvious magic.)”
”(It has its upsides. What she could still do, no-one would be ready for.)”
“Hmm. I’m getting stuck in the idea of stealing it again, I could trade with any of the mortal targets in some way. Maybe. But what with? Barter food for food? Sex might take some doing... Knowledge? Something else? Gh. Even though trade is one of my specialities, I’d need to figure out my approach on the ground. Mortals tend to get suspicious of demons appearing before them with a grand proposal. For some reason.”
”Ungrateful. I always give what I’m asked for and more.”
”To ask to learn is to ask to be changed. It’s just their nature to be indecisive.”
”It’s not like deals with other aethereals go better for them, but they hear more about bad deals with demons.”
”That’s just because we make more deals in the first place.”
“Well, speaking of mortals, it’s time for my guest advisors to give their opinions.”
Where should I go?
>The Spiral Tap of Kuph-and-Ehrh – Fight, evade, or challenge horny fae-beast-demon monsters in a prehistoric demiplane of overpopulation and overconsumption, and win the horn off the very head atop it all. Aphannit’s personal power could be used fully, though likely to be answered in kind. A place of particular violence.
>The Dungeon of Akamak the Oasis-Seeder – Infiltrate the laboratory-lair of a genius and perverted archmage, avoid or overcome his traps and minions, and steal a treasure from his hoard. Aphannit would not be totally unrestrained, but mana and magic would be in great supply, so long as the wizard’s wards are circumvented.
>The Hook of the Pirate God – Plunder the most precious treasure to be found in an armada of amorous, swashbuckling sea peoples, wherever in the wide world of their age of exploration it might be. Still a world of magic, but at a more natural level. That also means less active magical opposition.
>Eat the Rich – Slink through the shadows of a technological dystopia and liberate a new means of production for the people. Eventually. Haviel will take care of it, for sure. To make that happen, haunt or whore your way to the top and find an edge to run with to get it in your hands. It’s a world where magic exists behind the curtain – mostly. Ignorance can be taken advantage of.
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