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Magic Circles
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>Just don't be nervous
>Mayor has seen me totally naked already
>"Uh Frillsby why are you blushing?"
"Because I was thinking about how hot that coffee must have been so I burned my cheeks just thinking about it and now they're red okay there's literally no other possible reason. Now instead of focusing on that I'm going to change the subject by saying that the first rule of dating is not to listen to your advice, but I'm nervous enough to break a rule. What've you got?"
>"First of all, don't get her teen pregnant."
"That's impossible, she's not a teen."
>"Don't get her pregnant at all Frillsby!!"
"I'm not! I'm not even going to sleep with her!"
>"People don't get pregnant by sleeping! It's sex and if you have sex you'll end up double gay!"
"I'm not even going to ask! What's the other advice?"
>"First off, you're dressed all casual, and dates are all about nonsense clothes. A whole new outfit is needed!"
"What, like a commemorative t-shirt for both of us to prove to Ceo that we did date?"
>"That's a good idea Frillsby, we should get Ante on that. Speaking of places in town, you'll have to take her to the best place in town! Like that sloppy cheesecake warehouse."
"Gallsby that place moved out years ago to another town."
>"Then go there!"
"Also it's not fancy, it's like... a grease shack."
>"Wow! Okay fine we'll move on. Embarrassing date boners are horrible, luckily I can fix that! I will suck your dick every 15 minutes from now until the date."
"Gallsby this is why I don't listen to your advice, I'm not even going to spend a half hour talking about the obvious reasons why that will never work. Plus I'm dating a girl, half your advice isn't even applicable."
>"What! I know all sorts of stuff about dating girls."
Someone knocks on the table.
>"Uh." Poe says. "I'm gonna go check in at the local motel. Thanks for doing what you're doing to get Ceo some help, sorry about the whole speeding thing. I'll drop a check by tomorrow, okay?"
"Yeah, that'll do."
>"Who writes checks?" Gallsby mutters.
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